Our relationships mirror our programming of childhood. If you feel that this aspect of your life is not working well then check with yourself and make necessary changes in your programming. If you find that you are not getting along with your spouse or have angry arguments with your parents often or your boss is tough to handle or overall you feel lonely then most probably you come from a dysfunctional family. when we are brought up in a dysfunctional family then we are more prone to have relationships issue. There are following themes of dysfunctional families :
- RIVALRY BASED : certain dysfunctional families are based on rivalry. Kids grow up in competition among themselves as well as with outsiders. As a result they are trained to grow up either to be a looser or to be all time winner because theme of competition requires winners and losers. Both traits are not useful in creating harmonious relationships in life. If you feel this was your family’s theme then work on BEING GRACEFUL WITH YOUR UNIQUENESS.
- THANKLESSNESS : people who grew up with this theme are prone to be alone in later years of their lives. Thanklessness generally leads to loneliness. The real effect of this theme can be seen in old age. Families, which operate out of this theme take all the relationships for granted and are thankless for any human effort. If you feel you were brought up in a thankless atmosphere then work on GRATITUDE.
- MASK BASED : some of us have been brought up with mask based theme. Such families believe in appearing always with mask. Regardless of what is going on in their lives they always appear with a happy smile in front of others. Children who are brought up with this theme grow up as experts in hiding their feelings and do not believe in receiving help because asking for help takes their mask away. So if you feel that you have relationship issues in life then check weather you belong to mask based theme. If yes then work on FAITH .
- JUDGEMENT BASED : dysfunctional families who belong to this theme generally groom their kids (unintentionally)with lots of toxins in the form of negative emotions. Being judgmental makes the people very limited in their approach. They tend to see all the relationships through their judgmental eyes and try to change others maintaining their righteous approach. if you feel your relationships are not working and your upbringing belongs to this theme then work on being NON JUDGMENTAL.
The relationship is an important aspect and can effect our carrier and health if not doing well. We can choose to be willing to change and shed off the negative patterns which are not serving us anymore. By doing this we allow ourselves to grow.